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Exploding

I was watching this series called 'Drop Dead Diva'. This series totally remind me about part of life I misses. Is about a lady used to be slim hot sexy and well but not so brainy. But now she is fat and way beyond size 4 and she is a smart lawyer.
How could I misses this? I am not used to be hot or sexy? I am not a Lawyer either. I misses my size 3 clothings huhuhuhuhuhu.....:(
When we are getting ageing , nutrition is totally not absorbing into your body and metabolism getting too low and whatever we ate convert into fat adding to below our skin thicker and thicker and thicker....here goes your size getting bigger and bigger and bigger and it is hard to stop from being explode from your existing pants!
Result to this?
More shopping to do or may end up repeating the same clothings again and again and again.
I have no patient to exercise or even eat healthy food such as oat for breakfast and eat salad for my lunch and dinner. I have nobodyelse to blame but only myself.
Who I am right now and how I look right now or to be exact the same person I am seeing everyday on the mirror..... this is the result of my own wrong doing.
Forgive me God! I repent again..... please give me more patient to reduce my weight.

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